Week 1-Leo

I am having a hard time seeing myself as a teacher. During this whole process I have felt like a student who if performing for grades. I feel like I am playing a part in grand production. It is funny, but I feel more like a teacher when I am leading my church's bible study then I do when I visit a classroom. I think that this feeling exists because, at church, no one is grading me or judging my performance. In every block there is the clear evaluation period and I am obviously just borrowing a classroom full of students.

I think the easiest transition that I will find is the abandonment of the grading process that I undergo each semester. While I am aware that I will report to a higher authority, I am speaking more to the point of having ownership. I will be the teacher, not just the visiting or student-teacher.

The most challenging part for me is going to be the blank faces in the classroom. I try to participate as much as possible in a classroom and as a teacher I feel like I need to see that in my students. Unfortunately, not all my students will be interested or active so this frightens me because I am going to have to be extremely creative to get them involved. I think another challenge, closely related to this challenge, is going to be assessment of my students. I do not want to bog them down with tons of homework, nor do I want to constantly test them. I would like to depend more heavily on participation, but not all students are going to participate. This said, I still have to find out if they are still learning. This seems challenging for me.

I think that I already covered that I do not see myself as a teacher because I have no ownership over my classroom nor am I receiving a paycheck. Being a teacher, to me, means to be actively teaching. This means that a teacher should be in the classroom teaching, getting paid, and preparing for the next day. I associate being a teacher with having roots in a given community. For instance, the students should not only see me as their instructor, but also as their fan in sports and extracurriculars. Being a teacher means that you are part of the fabric of the students daily lives and you want them to become educated because these students are going to someday serve you, be it in restaurants, businesses, or physical health care. I do not feel I am there yet, but I am excited to become part of the community.